After All, I am a Monster
by Sir Knight Silvayne
Summary: Disowned and slightly deformed at a young age, raised by a criminal uncle, how will Keitaro manage his already messed up life? AU, takes place after the first exams where they end up in Kyoto. Slight crossovers but will remain primarily in Love Hina. KeitaroxShinobuxKanakoxMistress. "M-rating," but just to be safe, ADULTS ONLY
1. Chapter 1

After All, I am a Monster

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this story. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No copyright infringement is intended.

It was a warm summer night in the downtown Kyoto. Currently Keitaro Urashima and his tenant Naru Narusegawa were in a popular bar of the hotel they were staying at, hoping to drink their sorrows away. Well, Naru was, Keitaro was just there to make sure she would get back to their apartment safely. Now why was Naru drinking and not Keitaro? Simple really: they both failed the entrance exam to the prestigious Tokyo University.

Failure was nothing new to Keitaro. Oh no, he was quite used to it but he never allowed himself to feel bad or sad about it. Naru on the other hand…. Well, after studying nonstop all four years of high school, avoided having a social life and never having so much as two friends: she believed she could pass the exam just like any other test. Oh how wrong she was.

Keitaro sighed mentally as he watched his friend Naru effortlessly chug down another glass of alcohol.

'_Seven glasses down so far. I guess she isn't a lightweight after all.'_ Keitaro thought to himself.

Just as Naru had finished her glass of alcohol, she began to pour herself another from the provided pitcher the waitress had left behind. It was clear that she was drinking from anger rather than sorrow from how she roughly put down her glass. The _clank _was a dead giveaway after all.

Deciding to wet his whistle, Keitaro waved his hand in order to signal their waitress that he wanted a beverage, something non-alcoholic. Someone had to be the designated driver…er walker tonight.

Noticing what Keitaro was doing, Naru quickly spoke up "Put. Your. Hand. Down," she said, her voice seething full of anger.

Not wanting to argue Keitaro sighed before he did just that. Naru instantly went back to her drinking.

'_Eight glasses down. Must be her anger keeping the alcohol at bay.'_

"I don't know why you wanna drink." Naru said as she began to pour the remains of alcohol from the pitcher into her glass. "It's not like you've failed at anything. Oh! That's right; you should be used to failure! YOU FAILED THREE TIMES TO TRY TO GET INTO TODAI!"

Now, Keitaro was never one to get into a fight, especially with a drunk person. As the saying goes; "Don't argue with an idiot, they'll only succeed into brining you down to their level." Instead he did the one thing that was always guaranteed into stopping an argument before it would ever even begin.

"You are absolutely right. I don't deserve to drink." Keitaro replied instantly.

He would agree to whatever the person said to. Regardless of how much it would hurt him.

"YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I'M RIGHT! IF IT WEREN'T FOR YOU, I WOULD ALREADY BE A TOKYO UNIVERSITY STUDENT!"

Because of her outburst the entirety of the bar was now focused on the two of them. While Keitaro was calm and aloof, Naru was an emotional train-wreck at the moment.

Deep down, Keitaro was actually heartbroken at what his friend was saying to him. Deep down inside of him, he knew it wasn't the alcohol talking. It was all Naru.

"Yeah, you're right," Keitaro replied automatically this time.

"YOU SEE? EVEN YOU KNOW IT'S ALL YOU'RE FAULT! I SHOULD HAVE NEVER WASTED MY TIME IN TRYING TO TUTOR YOU! GOD WHAT WAS I THINKING!"

While he continued to look toward Naru, his head was slowly but surely beginning to look down. Try as he might, there was only so much Keitaro could take from Naru's verbal assault. Words hurt more than sticks and stones ever could.

"I MEAN I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT IF YOU COULDN'T EVEN PASS YOUR FIRST TIME AROUND THERE WAS NO WAY YOU COULD HAVE PASSED YOUR THIRD TIME!"

Keitaro himself knew that he was failure and that is what actually kept him going: the will to succeed. Keitaro wholeheartedly believed that while he may be a failure, he believed that one day he would accomplish a deed so great it would wipe away all his past failures in one fell sweep! Because of Naru, he was beginning to lose that one thing that kept him going.

"I-I Know N-Naru…" Keitaro's shield was beginning to fail him. She just wouldn't stop!

"DO YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE THAT SOME GIRL YOU PROMISED WHEN YOU WERE A KID IS GOING TO REMEMBER PROMISING TO GO TO TODAI WITH YOU?! WELL DO YOU?! BY SOME RANDOM ACT OF GOD SHOULD YOU PASS, YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN IF YOU GOT INTO TODAI AND SHE SAW YOU…? SHE WOULD BE DISAPPOINTED!"

In the corner of the bar they were drinking at was a man sitting by himself in the corner. His name: Kyoshiro Tohdoh, a recently retired Japanese Colonel. He could tell that by the young boy's posture, the way he kept his head low and covered, and finally the way he was gripping his hands tightly that he would soon snap. He had a knack for being able to tell what a person was going to do or what they were thinking by the way they would carry themselves. However, for some strange reason, he felt as though he knew the boy from somewhere. Yet he just couldn't place where he knew him from. Then it hit him! He knew exactly who the boy was now. Finishing his favorite orange flavored sweet tea, he simply left his money for the bill on the table and towards the only exit and began to wait….

Let it be said that Keitaro Urashima, had pride. Sure he may be a nerd by the social norms, a failure, and to some; a pervert. He had pride just as much as anyone else.

"BY NOW SHE MUST BE CLOSE TO GRADUATING! ONCE SHE FINDS OUT THAT YOU FAILED HER SO MANY TIMES IN THE PAST DO YOU HONESTLY BELIEVE SHE'LL WANT YOU, MUCH LESS EVEN WAIT FOR YOU? BY NOW EVEN SHE MUSH HAVE A BOYFRIEND WHOSE BY FAR EVEN GREATER LOOKING THAT YOU ARE! I MEAN JEEZ, WHY YOU DON'T JUST GIVE UP ALREADY IS BEYOND ME! YOU'LL NEVER BE HAPPY BECAUSE YOU'RE JUST A LOSER! JUST GIVE UP ALREADY!"

The patrons of the bar the two were at were getting angrier by the minute. One minute they were having their drinks, laughing, having a good time and the next the teenage brat was having a hissy fit for not getting into the school she wanted to. Oh, they all knew she was underage. They didn't say anything because they were all focused on having a good time and figured to let her enjoy the joy of alcohol. But that wasn't what was getting them angry. Oh far from it. It was the fact that she was blaming the poor guy wearing the black sunglasses. It struck them as weird that he was wearing sunglasses at night but hey, live and let live right? The more they heard from the raging brunette, the more they became sympathetic towards the poor guy she was berating.

The women of the bar were becoming very emotional right now. The fact that the poor guy was putting up with her meant that he cared very deeply for the scolding girl. It became intense for them knowing that he was trying to go to school based on a promise and not to further his own education or even his future. A promise to his childhood sweetheart *sigh* why couldn't they find a guy that was so determined to keep a promise to them like the man wearing the sunglasses did? The sunglasses he wore worked for him! It gave him a dose of mystery and besides, a little bit of mystery is good for any working relationship.

And… that was it. That was the final straw that broke the camel's back. Instead of getting angry or hell even crying, Keitaro just took it all in stride. What he did next surprised Naru more than anything else.

He took off his sunglasses.

Ever since moving in the Hinata Dormitory, they had never once seen him without his glasses. Even while he slept, Naru would occasionally look down from her room into his and there he was: sleeping dormitoryndly with a pair of black goggles covering his eyes. It made her curious wondering if he was really asleep or was actually watching her from his position.

For the first time in eight months (AN: I can't remember how long the wait was for them to take the exam so I just made up a number) she had finally seen his eyes. Well his right eye anyway. He was using his left hand to cover his left eye for some reason. In truth, she was actually mesmerized by the beautiful shade of lovely brown that were his eye color. His shaggy brown hair actually did him some justice for once.

'_W-what's wrong with his eye? Is Keitaro hurt? Oh no… is…is he crying? Why did I say all those mean things to him! Nonononononononononon!'_Naru was the tsundere type and she didn't even realize it.

"I know that Naru."

Naru gasped slightly by Keitaro's monotone voice.

"I have always known that."

'_What is he talking about? What does he mean he's always known that? Has he-'Naru's_ train of thought was interrupted by Keitaro who continued to say his peace.

"When I was five years old Naru, my own parents would call me a failure. Everything you have just said is nothing that I am not use to."

Now for the first time, Naru was actually quiet. No one at Hinata Dormitory knew much about their manager and his past. So Naru absorbed everything Keitaro said.

"I realize that I am a failure. I realize that by now my promised girl must be close to graduating and must have found someone who is indeed 'by far even greater looking' than I am. I've accepted that I am a failure."

'_Is h-he actually serious? Did he take everything I said to heart?' _While Keitaro continued to look towards Naru, Naru herself kept her head down to avoid Keitaro's gaze.

"Until now Naru," Keitaro said as his right eye began to swell with tears, "I've always believed that I could change. I always believed that I could change for the better. But…"

Naru herself began to cry some while ago. If what Keitaro said was true then, she just made things worse for him. _'But what Keitaro…?'_

"But now," Keitaro continued as his right eye began to drop fresh made tears, "The one thing I always believed in is nothing more than a lie. I mean, if my best-friend said the same thing my own parents always told me, then…" Keitaro broke off as he more and more tears began to fall from his exposed eye. For right now, he just didn't care if crying was a sign of weakness. For now, for now he has earned his right to cry.

'_Wait! After all I've put him through, he considers me his best-friend? When the hell did this happen? For that matter, what did you believe in Keitaro? Please don't tell me I've ruined your own believes!'_

"…then it must be true…." Keitaro said as he covered his eyes again with his sunglasses. "I- I don't think we should be friends anymore Narusegawa-san. I'm going to some family I have here. The room is yours." Keitaro said as he walked away from their table toward the bar's front door. Before he left, he went up to the barkeep, intending to pay for Naru and her pitcher of alcohol. Instead the barkeep refused saying that he [Keitaro] didn't have to pay. With that, Keitaro had left the bar and headed straight for the buildings main exit.

Naru was fighting a losing battle with herself. On one hand, she had finally gotten rid of Keitaro and his annoying self and no longer had to worry about him anymore. The other half of her wanted to cry more than anything else and run after him, hell-bent on apologizing to him and convincing him to not give up on his beliefs or their friendship.

'_I don't need him! He'll only slow me down and hold me back! Besides, Kitsune is my best-friend.'_

'_He did something that no one else was able to do: he penetrated your heart and now you need him in your life.'_

'_I don't need Keitaro! Once I get into TODAI, I'll have Seta and then Keitaro will be a thing of the past!'_

'_Why not get rid of Kitsune then? Along with Motoko, Su, Shinobu, Haruka and lets not forget: Grandma Hina. After all, once you get Seta, they'll become just like Keitaro: A thing of the past.'_

'…'

"_Got nothing to say? Huh. That's a first. You use your brain more than you use your mouth. It's not too late for you, you know. Then again, perhaps you have to lose what you never had to realize what you've lost.'_

With that Naru stayed sitting down crying silently, her back towards the other patrons.

"You know, that guy deserves a better woman than that." One of the male patrons said.

"Yeah," a woman this time replied, "Cutie like that deserves someone who won't hassle him all the time."

"Oh I know right!" Another woman replied to the first.

Naru was doing the best she could to avoid hearing what the customers were saying about her but to no avail. Instead, she continued to drink from the pitcher the waitress had brought to her while she was ranting on Keitaro.

Feeling the summer night's air was a welcome comfort for Keitaro as he walked out of the hotel he and Naru were staying at. Instead of wanting to feel sorry for himself, he began to walk away from the hotel with no particular destination in mind.

As he began to walk around, Keitaro began to think about recent events in his life.

First of all, his inheritance from his grandmother: Hina Urashima. His inheritance was none-other than the famous Hinata-Dormitory and all its land which was literally half of Hinata City itself! Now, any other man would have been easily ecstatic about coming into such property value. Any other man would have been excited about becoming manager of an all-girls dormitory. Not him.

After being disowned by his parents years ago for not being able to live up to their expectations, Keitaro at the young age of thirteen began to live with his father's brother – Kei Urashima, the man that Keitaro is named after. Now, Kei was far from being a good man. Kei lived his life from doing one bad thing after another. Why his parent's named him after a professional felon, Keitaro had zero idea. After living with the man for a year in his crappy little apartment, Kei had begun to call Keitaro, "Zero." As a result that Keitaro had begun to do horrible in school. Then again, what boy wouldn't do horrible in school after being disowned by his parents?

His time living with his uncle had made him learn a few things. At the top of his head: how to pick a lock, learn the exits of every place you go to, improvise when necessary, tell good cops from bad, and how to use both a knife and gun properly. Younger kids would have been happy to know this. Not Keitaro. Keitaro would have wanted nothing more than to be with his parents.

For the next five years, Keitaro had only two things that kept him sane. One: his childhood promise to his mystery girl and two: the hope that he would someday accomplish a great deed that would wipe away all his failures. The first goal should have been all he needed to survive. In truth, not even Keitaro knew why the second option made him get out of his bed every day. It was just one of those things that you had to go by until the answer would come to you.

'_While my folks may want nothing to do with me, I at least still have Aunt Haruka and Grandma Hina at least…'_

Keitaro had stopped dead in his tracks when he felt that he was being followed.

Remembering a lesson from his uncle, Keitaro decided to put it to use. Keitaro began to look around in front of him while walking, hoping to find a reflective of some sort to see his follower. He knew immediately that it couldn't be Naru. She was tipsy from the pitcher of alcohol she was drinking so to follow Keitaro, she would have had to overcome the state of nausea she would have been in.

So far he had yet to find a building or car even to give him an edge. So instead, Keitaro did something else to catch his follower. Looking around, Keitaro was fortunate enough to realize that the street was near empty. The only ones on it were himself, elderly couples and his follower from what he could tell.

As Keitaro kept walking, he came to an alleyway and stood still pretending to look for something in his pockets. Through his peripheral vision, Keitaro was able to see that the alleyway was pitch black and had a large dumpster as well as a few trash bins. It was perfect for him!

Continuing to fumble in his pockets Keitaro jerked his arm towards the alley as if he were being pulled in.

"What the-'' Keitaro said, loud enough hopefully for his follower to hear his cry. Then, Keitaro pushed himself, making sure that he was pulled in by. Once in the alleyway, Keitaro took off his shoe and tossed it further in, and then jumped behind the dumpster and began to wait patiently.

Soon enough his follower came through. From what Keitaro could see, his follower went straight for his shoe, probably hoping to get a clue from it.

Before Keitaro jumped out from behind to confront his follower, Keitaro had a flashback of a lesson his uncle had taught him when it came to fighting.

Flashback begins

"_Listen up Zero because I'm only gonna say this once got it!" Kei Urashima said to the thirteen year old boy who had fear in his eyes. _

"_When fighting, there is no such thing as fighting dirty or fighting fair! It's all about survival of the fittest! It doesn't matter what you do so long as you win! Now… come at me!" _

"_W-won't you get h-hurt Uncle Kei?" Keitaro asked his voice full of concern for his uncle's wellbeing. _

_His uncle's response was nothing more than a snort and a slight little laugh. "You hurt me Zero? Yeah, that'll be the day. Now come at me! Since I'm in a good mood, I'll give you a hint: Remember to aim low since I'm taller than you." _

_Keitaro simply nodded and then charged at his uncle. Unfortunately for his short size, Keitaro was unable to get within arms' length of his uncle. Instead his uncle had quickly punched the young boy in the face who quickly fell to the ground. _

_The young boy stayed on the ground, tears swelling in his eyes. His only comfort came from his own hand on his bruised left cheek. Keitaro let out a slight sob, and wanted to cry but before he could, his uncle had interrupted him. _

"_DON'T YOU DARE CRY," the forty-five year old man said. "Get up Zero before I punch you even harder than before. We're going to do this until you can at least lay a decent hit on me!" _

_With that said, young Keitaro quickly got up and did the best he could to stop the tears in his eyes. "Y-yes, Uncle Kei," young Keitaro said, his voice full of pain, and at the same time obedience. _

_Flashback Ends_

Keitaro snapped back to the present and noticed that his follower was on his knee, looking at Keitaro's shoe.

Keitaro slowly and quietly removed his other shoe and began to make his way to the kneeling person. Making his way toward the follower, Keitaro quietly picked up a trash can that was filled with garbage. If he were lucky, Keitaro would whistle, the follower would look at his direction, Keitaro would throw the trash's contents at the man and then the trash can. In doing so the man would go down long enough for Keitaro to hold him down to get information on who the man is and why he was following Keitaro. At least that was his plan.

It didn't work out for Keitaro.

While Keitaro was able to throw the trash's contents at the man, it was nothing more than piles of wet paper. In hindsight, Keitaro should have realized that based on how light the trashcan was. Either way, Keitaro still threw the metallic trashcan at the man only for him to duck and then tackle Keitaro.

Keitaro's plan worked alright just on the wrong person.

Keitaro was now pinned underneath the man, trying with all his might to remove him but to no avail.

"You're trained. Well trained but not greatly Keitaro," the man on top of him asked questioningly.

Thinking of a response, Keitaro could only do the only thing he could think of and answered him. "Well, you know who I am, so what do you want." Keitaro asked his voice full of resentment from his plan not working in his favor.

"I'm surprised that you don't remember me from five years ago boy." The man had said in a gruff voice.

Keitaro knew immediately where this was going… the man who had him in a locked position wanted something from him. "If you're after my uncle, sorry to say but I have nothing to do with him anymore."

The man above him let out a slight chuckle at what Keitaro had said.

"No. I don't want him. I need you. I have a special job for you to perform for me… soldier!"

Keitaro's eye went wide at what the man had just called him. Keitaro had met a lot of different people during his time with his uncle. The majority of them to say the least was bad; scum of the Earth types that didn't deserve to live; at least in Keitaro's own personal opinion. There were times though when Kei would introduce good men and sometimes women to Keitaro. Ones that made him wonder how his criminal uncle knew such outstanding people. There was one man in particular that made a great impression on Keitaro one: Kyoshiro Tohdoh! The man was a legendary figure in the eyes of Keitaro Urashima.

"M-Major Tohdoh!" Keitaro sputtered out.

The man above him merely smirked and then got up from the boy underneath him, extending his hand out to help the young boy up.

"It's 'Colonel' now, well was colonel. I'm retired now Kid."

Keitaro took the offering hand of the man in front of him without hesitation, "Sorry Colonel Tohdoh, it won't happen again sir!"

"Its fine kid; anyway, let's go get a drink somewhere and I'll tell you what I need from you."

Keitaro simply nodded his head and began to follow his idol.

(Hinata-Dormitory same time)

It was just another Friday night over at the Hinata dormitory; the mood was calm and relaxing for all who were present. However for one young girl, it was unbearable. The bluenette paced around the phone, waiting for it to ring. Her stomach was in knots, her mind thinking various thoughts about the man that she loved. Was he safe? Was he hurt? Where was he? Did he eat something?

She began to fumble with her hands in a praying position. Coming from a family of atheists, she was never allowed to pray to any deity but ever since moving to the Hinata dormitory, she gained a great degree of freedom to do what she wanted. In reason of course.

Though she has been living at the dorms for just a few months, she loved every waking minute of it because she would always see the man who made a great difference in her life. The man that was so kind and caring to all, showed nothing but concern for those who everyone, and had a great heart inside of him. She had her first love.

The young girl was deeply in love with Keitaro Urashima but he was in love with the bully Naru. Not that he would ever notice her to begin with. She was seven years younger than he was and she doubted that he would ever give her the time of day. Still, that didn't stop her from spending time with him. Writing stories about how he would realize that she loved him more than anyone else and ask her to become his girlfriend and then later on have a dozen of children just for him and grow old together. For him, the young bluenette would try her hardest to give him the world. For him, there was no limit to what she would do for him.

"Shinobu? Are you still by the phone? It's pretty late you know," said a woman with a sword.

"Y-y-yes Motoko-San," Shinobu said, it still scared the young girl that Motoko carried a dangerous weapon in an age where guns were used.

Motoko smiled just a little before continuing. "Do not worry about Naru-san; she can take care of herself."

In the time that Shinobu had been here, Shinobu knew that Motoko hated men, all men with a strong passion. Not wanting to start a confrontation with the older girl, Shinobu changed her response, "Yes, Motoko-san," she said as she walked towards her room on the second floor near Naru's room.

Shinobu had changed into pajamas which was basically an oversized pink gown that her parents got for her. From there she said her nightly prayer which was focused solely on Keitaro and then went to sleep. He would call her tomorrow. She knew for sure. He would never let her worry if he could help it. With that, she blissfully went to sleep dreaming of none other than her beloved Keitaro.

AN: This is my first "Love Hina" story. If you figured it out, this is an alternate universe story where Keitaro has had nothing but the short end of the stick all his life.


	2. Chapter 2

After All, I am a Monster

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this story. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No copyright infringement is intended.

The warm summer air had ended and in its place an icy wind blew through the streets of Kyoto. City lights were turned on, guiding night-owls safely to their destinations. Shop owners were busy either counting their profits for the day or were busy closing up for the night. Either way, the day was over for some while for others like Keitaro, the night was just beginning for them.

After leaving the alley, Colonel Tohdoh, called for a ride using his cellphone. Within a matter of minutes, a black Acura MDX pulled up to them [1]. Keitaro thought that the matter of both convenience and timing was rather odd but brushed it off as he followed the colonel and got in the back of the car. The seats of the car were a comfortable brown leather, the inside of the car was colder than he would have wanted but, being a guest, saying what he wanted didn't exactly leave him with much to say. Keitaro briefly saw the driver of the car was young but other than that, couldn't exactly see who it was.

"How have you been Keitaro?"

Finished placing his seatbelt on, Keitaro answered Colonel Tohdoh. "I've been well colonel. How have you been sir?"

Crossing his arms, the colonel spoke up. "Good enough. Retirement has been a living hell. Now, enough with the pleasantries ask what is really on your mind."

Let it be said that Colonel Tohdoh was never one for beating around the bush.

"Okay," Keitaro spoke up. "With all due respect sir, how the hell did you find me? I covered all my tracks."

Three years ago, eighteen year-old Keitaro Urashima had left his uncle's "home" and ventured out into the world. Keitaro survived for two years on his own with the money he bled and sweat for: by performing various jobs for people that hired him through his uncle's criminal contacts. Keitaro broke into "secure" areas; stealing various items that were worthless to him, but highly valuable to others, hacking into secure private networks, and if Keitaro was really desperate for money, intimidating targets by beating the crap out of them. Never killing them though; Keitaro had standards.

As the car was in movement, Colonel Tohdoh looked outside the cars window. Letting out a sigh, he spoke up; "Believe it or not, it was simply luck. That or by fate I was in the corner of the bar where you and your… loud friend were at."

Keitaro was successful _in_ hiding his emotions he failed though to hide what he was feeling though: dread. Another lesson from his uncle came to mind: _Never reveal your personal contacts. _

While Naru Narusegawa could hardly be considered a contact, she could still be used against him. Contacts in the criminal underworld meant everything! They knew who you were; where you lived, what jobs you wanted and preferred, they knew everything there was to know about you! In Keitaro's case; Naru knew everything there was to know about the Hinata-Dormitory and all its inhabitants. To have one betray you meant certain death.

As much as he respected and idolized the man, Keitaro would have to be careful regardless of the "job" the colonel had for him. Not for himself, but for those at the Hinata.

"I see," Keitaro said simply not taking his eyes off the man staring outside the window.

For a while, the car ride was met with unpleasant silence.

'_I'm surprised,'_ Colonel Tohdoh pondered to himself:_ 'That woman, as loud as she was as well as being cruel, Keitaro cares for her. I won't question who she is unless he brings it up.' _

"This job," Keitaro spoke up, "What does it consists of and how much will I make?" The sooner the job was finished, the sooner Keitaro could easily go back into hiding.

Colonel Kyoshiro Tohdoh smirked mentally. He knew that Keitaro could not resist money but more importantly, he knew there was one thing Keitaro had wanted more than anything else. More than his childish promise of being accepted into Tokyo University, there was one thing he wanted but could never have…

"Keitaro," Tohdoh spoke up, "Do you still want to be a soldier?"

(0.0.0)

As late as it was for her, she couldn't help but toss and turn. As always she thought of the one person who made a difference in her life, the one who told her to always be herself. Keitaro Urashima, her beloved older brother.

Sixteen year-old Kanako Urashima, the adoptive sister to Keitaro, missed her brother each and every single day, ever since he was disowned. While she may have never known the reason, she had her theories, but with nothing to go on, it was all just that: theories with no way to prove them.

She remembered the day she met him down do the last detail…

_Flashback Begins_

_It was a warm but cool spring morning in downtown Tokyo City. Kanako had left the orphanage she was placed in for good and she could not be any happier. A nice couple had just adopted her, and promised that they would love, and protect her until their dying day. They went so far as to promise that should they have an early death, their son –Keitaro- would protect her. _

_That made her happier more than anything else: a brother that would protect her and her alone. _

_At an early age, Kanako had been abandoned by her parents. She was too young to remember them but she didn't care. Her biological parents had left her on the front steps of the orphanage she was staying at and for seven and a half years, she stayed there. Patiently waiting for someone, anyone to come and adopt her. _

_Finally, her day came. They were the Urashima couple, the same family that donated fresh baked goods to the orphanage she stayed in. Truth be told though, she hated sweets more than anything else. She didn't reveal that to them though, she wanted out and would be more than willing to eat the baked goods when necessary. _

_Currently, Kanako was seated in the backseat of her new parent's car, sitting uncomfortably due to the bright pink dress they bought for her. The car ride was long and rather quiet. Her new mom would look back towards her and smile every ten minutes to make sure she was fine. Her new dad, well, he just kept his eyes on the road. _

_After what seemed like an eternity, they had finally managed to arrive at their home/bakery. _

"_Well," Mrs. Urashima said, "This is it! Welcome to your new home Kanako-chan!" _

_Stepping outside of the car she was just in, Kanako absorbed the surroundings of her new environment. At the orphanage there were on average two security camera's per room: one on the entrance to every room and the other watching the main area of each room. From where she stood, she could see a kitchen area that was full of color, life and warmth. So different compared to the orphanage's dark and dull, emotionless cafeteria she was used to. What made things really different for her were the people and the children nearby. They all had a smile on their face. _

_For Kanako, she rarely smiled. In her young life, she only smiled once and that was she and the other children were watching an anime series about a young girl and her older brother trying to survive with no one other than each other in a huge city. The other children didn't like it because it was too sad but Kanako; she loved it. A brother that is all she had ever really wanted in her life. Soon enough, she was going to meet her new brother. _

"_Um…mom…?" Kanako looked up at her new mother, hesitation in her voice. _

"_Yes sweetheart?" _

"_When…um…when uh, when will I meet my big brother?" Kanako blushed slightly for some strange reason. Her mother, she looked down at her and gently pulled her into a hug. _

"_Soon, princess, I promise. He left before your daddy and I went to go and pick you up." She said, a smile appeared on her face and continued. "He wanted to make you as much as welcome as possible so he left to get you a gift." _

_Now Kanako had her hair styled in a way where a good part of her hair covered up her right eye. When she heard that her new brother had gotten her a gift, her little heart fluttered for just a bit. Her visible eye had widened big as a saucer. _

"_A-a gift? How come?" Kanako asked in disbelief. No one, other than her new parents had ever made her feel welcomed. And right now, a complete and total stranger was coming back soon enough with a gift just for her. Her mind began to think of all the many things it could be, could it be a puppy? A kitten, a stuffed animal perhaps, the possibilities were infinite. Before she could ask any more questions, her mother had shouted, the name of the man that would forever change her life. _

"_KEITARO!" She began to wave and smile greatly. _

_Looking toward the path that her mother was waving at, she saw him! She saw Keitaro, her big brother. _

_Walking towards them, Keitaro had an aura of confidence surrounding him, the way he walked, no glided down the sidewalk made it visible. His short brown hair danced gently to the morning breeze and made him look mesmerizing. His left hand stayed inside the confines of his black school uniform, while his right hand carried a small brown paper bag. In truth, well Kanako's perspective, her new older brother was simply cool and handsome as well! _

_Keitaro had reached her and was now standing right in front of her looking down at her while Kanako was looking up at him. They both remained still looking at one another, analyzing each other. Finally, it was Keitaro who broke the silence. He kneeled down to Kanako's level and smiled. _

"_So," Keitaro said, "you're Kanako-chan?" _

_Kanako remained speechless, her brother was handsome! The boys in the orphanage were all disgusting, mean and rude. So far, her brother Keitaro had managed to proof that not all boys were icky! _

_Kanako simply nodded at her Keitaro. _

_A small smile appeared on his face. "I see," he said, then, he gently placed the small brown bag onto the cement. Using his now free hand; Keitaro moved the lock of hair that hid Kanako's eye out of the way. "That's better," he simply said with a smile. _

_Kanako had developed a small phobia of showing her face entirely but, for him, she would bare it. _

_Reaching into the bag, Keitaro spoke up, "Before I give you your gift, I just want you to know that, for as long as I can, I promise to always be there for you. I promise to protect you from harm and I also promise to love you for as long as I live." _

_Kanako was dumbfounded; she had never heard anyone say those sorts of words to her before. Tears of happiness were forming in her big scarlet eyes, and a large smile appearing on her small delicate face. _

'He loves me… my wish, my wish has finally come true!'

_Without so much as hesitating, Kanako jumped forward and wrapped her arms around her brothers neck, snuggling herself against him. Following immediately, Keitaro wrapped his arms around her and hugged just as tightly. Keitaro could see his mother with tears in her own eyes, and her hands on her chest, he could easily tell that she was proud of him for what he had told Kanako. Mr. Urashima however, stood still watching everything as it happened stoic as ever. _

_It was Kanako who broke free first. _

_Being up close to her brother made her blush again, her little heart fluttering rapidly and so many strange new feelings that she had never felt before in her young life. _

"_This is for you Kanako-chan!" Keitaro said as he reached into the bag and pulled out her gift. _

_Kanako gasped in awe of the gift that was hers._

_Flashback Ends_

Getting out of her futon, Kanako moved towards the opposite side of her room, towards her shelf. On her shelf, awards of all kinds: ribbons, certificates, trophies and medals, the latter being gold for her skills in karate, jiu-jitsu, and various other forms of martial arts. While they made her parents and grandmother proud; they meant absolutely nothing to her.

To her they were nothing more than a waste of space. Her shelf could have been used for things entirely different if she had her way.

'_Memories for Keitaro-kun and I' _Kanako thought to herself.

Years ago, when Keitaro was forced to leave, she realized that she loved him not as her brother, but as a man. She grabbed her most treasured item, the gift from her Keitaro. It was worn from constant use but she still loved it more than anything. Her most treasured item was a small but adorable black toy kitten with giant green eyes.

Brining it close to her heart, Kanako hugged it tightly and sighed in content.

After Keitaro had given her the gift, they spent the entire day together. They went to the Hinata-Inn together to meet her grandmother and her cousin/aunt Haruka. Those two did not get along so great. Still don't. That day was one of the best days of her life. She gained a family but they failed in comparison to the magnificence of her Keitaro.

From the day that she met him, she stuck to her Keitaro like glue. As busy as he would be sometimes, he always made time for her, always asked how her day went, what she was feeling, what she wanted to eat, what she wanted to do, and what she dreamed of.

Kanako loved the way Keitaro had treated her; as though she was the only girl on the planet.

About a month after staying with the Urashima family did she find out about Keitaro's dream: to meet up again with some skank and go to college with her.

While she may not have showed it at the time, Kanako was severely pissed off. Of course she didn't take it out on her brother. He was far too kind hearted to be abused. So instead, she asked her parents for Karate lessons. When they asked why, her reason was simple: to protect Keitaro someday.

With that, they had agreed. Her parents asked Haruka to teach her the family style, and like a sponge, Kanako absorbed everything she was taught.

While Haruka was against teaching her not out of concern but rather the fact they could not get along, she agreed reluctantly. The two of them had worked together for what seemed like an eternity, (roughly seven weeks) Kanako had finally managed to learn the gist of the Urashima fighting style. It wouldn't be until another three years at her pace to become a master of it.

Keitaro was so proud of her for learning so fast the basics of the Urashima family style. When she asked why he didn't learn, he simply said, "I don't like violence." That made her love her brother even more. He was a kind and gentle man all the more reason for her to become strong to protect him someday!

Sadly, when "someday" had finally came, she was too defenseless to do anything to help her beloved brother. Kanako remembered that day all too well along with what happened the following days as well.

_Flashback Begins_

_After living with her family for a year, tragedy had struck. After turning eight years old, Kanako and her mom were on their way to go and pick up Keitaro from one of his friends' houses. It was raining that day and when Keitaro had called home, mother had instructed him to stay put, she was going to go and pick him up so he wouldn't get sick. _

_After driving for roughly twenty minutes, the two of them were a block away from Keitaro and his friend's house when they were hit. Kanako was safely seated in the back of the car on her booster seat, when suddenly they were hit. From her seat, Kanako saw her mom hit the window. Hard. _

_Kanako was scared, more than anything else. Her mom was bleeding and not moving and the driver that hit them got out of his car, cursing and hitting her mom's car. Not so much as using his hands but rather the man was kicking her mom's car. _

_Kanako had remained perfectly still in her booster seat. She watched and listened as the man continued to curse and hit the car with his feeble kicks. _

"_YOU STUPID ***** YOU WRECKED MY CAR!" The man said, continuing his rant, he moved away back to his car looking at the damage. He looked back, and continued to rant, cursing a storm that was when he noticed Kanako. _

_In the instant he noticed Kanako was paralyzed with fear. Time seemed to slow down for her. Step by step he moved towards her until he finally reached the outside of the window. An evil smirk on his face, he knocked on the window. Kanako flinched when he did that. _

"_Hi little girl," he said in a sickly sweet voice, "Lemme help you out." _

_Back at the orphanage, Kanako and the other children had learned to never trust a stranger. Especially when they said they were here to help, asking if they wanted candy. _

_Kanako, in a scared voice, spoke up, "I-I'm fine." She lied, she was far from fine. She was scared more than anything else. She wanted her brother here; she wanted him here to make the bad man go away! _

"_No," the man said, "You need my help." He said as he tried to open the side door of the van. Quickly thinking on her part, Kanako moved quicker than he did and was able to lock the side of the door. _

_The man chuckled to himself, his smirk widening to impossible lengths. "Putting up a fight huh," The man said, "Alright then, let's see how you like this." Reaching into his coat, he pulled out a pair of brass knuckles; he slipped them on and readied his fist. _

_Kanako was beyond scared right now! She tried to get out of her booster seat only to find out that her seatbelt had become crushed on impact. _

'Where were the police at? Where is big brother? Anyone!'

_Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of glass breaking. _

"_Heh, don't worry kid, I promise to take good care of you," he said after he had opened the door to the van. _

_Time had slowed down once again. The man's hand was slowly but surely closing the gap between him and her. She tried to get away but Kanako was stuck, her mom unconscious and a stranger getting close to taking her away. Kanako's bright scarlet eyes began to fill with fresh tears. _

"_Keitaro," she quietly said to herself, her voice full of desperation, "Help me, please!" _

_Suddenly, a black flash appeared from nowhere and the next thing she knew, the angry/scary man was suddenly tackled to the ground. From her booster seat, Kanako was able to see the back of her savior. _

"_Kanako," he said, getting up slowly. "I promised you that I would always protect you. I'm here now." Keitaro said turning toward his sister and giving her a reassuring smile. It didn't last long but it was enough to convince her that she would be alright. _

_Looking straight ahead to where the man was down on the ground, Keitaro's smile turned into a face of pure determination. More than anything else, he was determined to keep his little sister safe, no matter what happened to him!_

"_Boy, you've got some balls! I'll give you that," the man said as he was getting up, "Do you have any idea who you are messing with!" _

"_No and quite frankly, I don't care!" Keitaro said, in a confident voice while readying into a fighting stance._

_As the rain continued to fall, the man stood up, and simply said, "I'm Yakuza," a small smile appearing on his face. With that, the man charged her brother, brass knuckles in hand. From there on, Kanako could only watch in horror as he fought against a mobster. _

_Flashback Ends_

Her brother had managed to last long enough for the police and paramedics to arrive. Her brother fought against a man who committed crimes for a living and that scared her more than anything else. Her brother saved her from a criminal and yet the police didn't even give him as much as congratulation. Although truth is, the "Yakuza" member was actually an accountant with a pedophilic fetish and a penchant for telling lies.

That day however was just the beginning of problems for both her Keitaro. A month after the incident, their mother had wakened from a coma. When she was cleared out from the hospital, their mother began act differently towards Keitaro for some strange reason. While Keitaro was an "A and B" student, she began to demand that Keitaro makes "A's" from now on.

When Keitaro couldn't make the grade, she would slap him hard, or make him go without eating food, sometimes, she would just lock him out. Their father, he just stood by and allowed this to go on. One day, Kanako came back home to her mother ranting; yelling at Keitaro about how she doesn't have a "perfect" son and how Keitaro is a failure. Kanako's little heart broke at the sight of her brother enduring all that their mother shouted at the top of her lungs.

Try as hard as he did, Keitaro was never able to manage to become the "perfect son" she wanted him to be. Kanako never really 'liked' her adoptive parents. No, she tolerated them but never truly liked them. While they did provide for her, they never really talked or treated her the way Keitaro did.

_Flashback Begins_

_The day after their mother ranted at Keitaro, Kanako woke up and headed straight for her brother's room. Opening the door Kanako was shocked at what she saw, or rather, the lack of what she saw. Keitaro's room was completely empty. Devoid of life, the warmth that had once engulfed the room was gone, replaced by sheer coldness. _

"_MOM," Kanako said, complete worry in her voice. The sound of footsteps filled the silence of the house; soon enough, her mom came. "What is it Kanako-chan?" _

"_Why is Keitaro's room empty" Kanako demanded to know. _

_Nonchalantly, her mom simply said, "Oh sweetie, he doesn't live here anymore, I disowned him." She said as she kneeled down and gently kissed her head. "Now, I've got to go and help your father down in the bakery. Enjoy your day off." _

_Kanako was too shocked to realize that her mother had kissed her forehead._

'_H-he doesn't l-live here…anymore? Disown?' _

_Kanako's thoughts were racing a million miles per hour. Her heart was beating faster and faster, a cold sweat engulfing her body. She became disoriented but managed to go back to her room for her dictionary at the bottom of her bookshelf. Cracking it open, she began to look for the word her mother had used. When she got to the section, a small white paper fell out of the book. Ignoring the paper, she found the word and it made her eyes began to water._

**Refuse to acknowledge or maintain any connection with**

_Her sweet, kind, gentle and innocent older brother was abandoned! Her parents abandoned him! The same way her real parents abandoned her! How could they, how could her parents get rid of their real son! How could her "mother" do this to her Keitaro!_

_Kanako's cold sweat was long gone now. Replaced by sheer anger and hatred, gripping the book in her small hands, she threw it! Kanako began to destroy her room, more importantly; she began to destroy all the "gifts" her "parents" gave her. She didn't care if they got angry with her. Hell, if Kanako was lucky, they would disown her too and she could be reunited with her brother! _

_After five minutes of total destruction, Kanako's once tidy room was a complete and utter mess. Toys lay broken on the floor, books pages ripped to shreds, her blanket torn in half, her pillows feather's lingering in the air. Kanako stood motionless in the middle of her room, tears falling freely from her big scarlet eyes, her fists clenched tightly. _

_Kanako wanted nothing more than for her Keitaro to be here right now!_

_In a manner of speaking, he was. Underneath her desk was the toy kitten Keitaro had given her when she was adopted. Unclenching her tiny fists, she moved to pick it up. Right next to her most valuable treasure was the folded paper that fell from her dictionary. Curiosity got the best of her and she opened it._

_Flashback Ends_

Snapping out of her memories, Kanako kissed the little toy on top of its forehead and placed it back on her shelf. From there, she opened one of her school textbooks that she hallowed out where she kept what few pictures she could find of Keitaro. The pictures all had one thing in common: Keitaro was smiling. That smile is what made Kanako fall in love with her brother so many years ago. She softly kissed her favorite one and placed it back into the safety of the book. Then, Kanako pulled out a white, crinkled paper; it was the same one that fell from her dictionary. Opening it, she began to read the letter from her beloved brother.

'_**Kanako, I just want you to know that I am sorry for being a failure. You deserve a better older brother, one that you can actually look up to. One that isn't a failure, for that I am sorry. Please be good for Mr. and Mrs. Urashima, they can give you a great life and a great education. If you should ever meet a boy (or girl) just makes sure they treat you right. It probably means nothing coming from me but, just know that I love you very much. Take care of yourself Kanako. Who knows, maybe we'll meet again in the future. Till then…**_

_**Love Keitaro. **_

As sad as it sounded, it gave Kanako hope. The hope that she would someday be reunited with her brother: her beloved Keitaro. Kissing the letter as well, she placed it back into the book and laid back into bed. Her final thoughts before drifting into a peaceful slumber were of her brother…

(0.0.0)

AN: I can't believe that this is my most popular story that people love! What really surprises me though is the poll. A lot of people want Haruka of all people to be Keitaro's mistress. Truthfully, I just placed her name in the poll for laughs. I didn't expect anyone to vote for her. Well, if that is what my readers want, it is what they will get. Also, for those of you who know Allison, she is going to be writing the more intimate scenes for later chapters! If any of you wish to write a different story based on mine, please send me a link for your story! With that, please leave a review. Later!


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